Some of you may be wondering why I decided to name my blog ‘Mom Guilt’ and more than some of you know the exact reason why I chose this name.
Mom Guilt is the feeling of guilt, doubt, anxiousness or uncertainty experienced by mothers when they worry, they're failing or falling short of expectations in some way.
I’m here to tell you that you shouldn’t be guilty, you shouldn’t feel doubt, I can’t control your anxiety, but you should never feel the uncertainty of falling short of expectations. I’m here to say mom guilt is a sham. It’s a cloud of unconfirmed doom that hangs over your head that you’ve created yourself. You are your biggest critic and it’s time to step out of your own way! Sorry! I probably shouldn’t yell at you because I want you to come back, but I’m so used to talking to myself and I want you to realize how amazing you are! When you remove MG, you are able to enjoy the now to your fullest potential. You are allowed to laugh, cry, yell, be angry with your 2-year-old for not eating their dinner and stand strong when you tell them, “NO POPCORN!”. You remove MG and you unleash the potential energy of the mom you want to be. Trust me, I’m no mom expert but I’m telling you what works for me.
For myself, Mom Guilt has crept into my form of stress relief, my known hobby, fitness. On leg day, normally my husband and I would spend 2-3 hours in the gym from warm-up to cool down no rush. Now I spend majority of my time looking at my watch or my phone wondering if I’m taking too long, do they think I’m taking advantage of them, OMG I spent 10 hours at work today and I’m spending 2 hours at the gym and not with my kids. I’m such a bad mom! I also would like to share another news flash. You were you before them. After those little angels spend 10 months invading ALL of your space and then the rest of their infant to toddlerhood you are allowed to be you again. Don’t forget about you! You are the same smart, driven, career-oriented woman you were before you had babies and you for damn sure can be one after! But now with much more characteristics like patience, consistency, organization, knowledgeable and brave. Not to mention, you now have an audience and they are 100% on your team. They may not know what it means for you to succeed but they want Mom to win.
I guess I didn’t choose mom guilt. Mom guilt chose me and when I say I will not fall victim to it. I WILL NOT. I challenge you Momma’s to take a stand with me and choose yourselves. It’s not wrong to wake up and want the very first thing you do in the morning to be for yourselves. It’s not wrong to pamper yourself and jump into a nice bath of mental health relief. Because as mom’s we need it. Whether it’s a glass of wine, painting, exercise, binge watching your favorite TV shows or shockingly enough work! The world is turning inside out, and we cannot stress over the things we cannot control. But we can take our immediate life, the one we live, by the horns and live every day to the fullest no guilt, no shame.
Mama B